My grandparents didn't want to be converted

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Wednesday February 29, 2012 · 5:08 PM PST

2012/02/29 · 17:08

My friend Mets102 has posted a couple of diaries recently about Mormons converting dead Jews to their faith, including Daniel Pearl, who was murdered for no reason other than that he was a Jew, and survivors and victims of the Holocaust, including such notables as Anne Frank and the families of Elie Wiesel and Simon Wiesenthal.

All four of my grandparents were posthumously converted too. They were all Holocaust survivors, each of whom had a very large extended family before the Holocaust. Between them, they had but a single living relative after the Holocaust.

And repeatedly, Mets102 and I and several other Jews who have a problem with this have been told we're whining, or "feigning anger," or crying over something that doesn't matter, or complaining for the sake of complaining, or otherwise making a big deal about nothing.

So first, a brief message to many (if not all) of those people who have said some version of this:

Go. Fuck. Yourself. Preferably with a rusty metal implement.

Yes, I know saying that will turn some of you off. I couldn't care less if that bothers you, though, not if you're going to side with the folks saying this doesn't matter.

wiscmass for Elders of Zion

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Thursday December 29, 2011 · 9:33 PM PST

2011/12/29 · 21:33

Parashat VaYigash
Genesis 44:18-47:27

With apologies if anyone else was planning on posting something; the schedule didn't show anyone for this week. I also haven't had time to write anything new, so here's a recycled drash from a couple years ago.

wiscmass for Elders of Zion

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Tuesday December 27, 2011 · 1:23 PM PST

2011/12/27 · 13:23

The internet is still relatively young, not even 50 years even if you count precursors, but the concept of hypertext is much older. One of the earliest written examples of hypertext is the Talmud, the 63-volume compendium of wisdom, law, and guidelines for life used by traditional Jews since its compilation over 1,500 years ago. Virtually every page of the text refers readers to other sources -- in fact, if you use some electronic versions of the Talmud, links to those references are included, though traditional Jews wouldn't use such a version on Shabbat or during chagim, good times for studying -- and if the text doesn't do it, the commentary will. A typical page of Talmud in contemporary volumes includes commentary from Rashi (11th century French rabbi known as the definitive commentator of virtually all Jewish texts to that time), Tosafot (medieval critical and explanatory commentaries), a series of cross-referencing tools, and sometimes a few other commentaries.

The Talmud was originally passed down orally; it wasn't redacted until about 1500 years ago, but even then it still had to be memorized -- it's not like there were enough copies for everyone to have their own. But even with the advent of the printing press, there has never been a widely recognized, accepted index.

Until now:

wiscmass for Elders of Zion

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Thursday December 15, 2011 · 3:08 PM PST

2011/12/15 · 15:08

Parashat VaYeshev
Genesis 37:1-40:23

✡ ✡ ✡ ✡ ✡ ✡ ✡ ✡ ✡ ✡ ✡ ✡ ✡ ✡ ✡ ✡ ✡ ✡ ✡ ✡ ✡ ✡ ✡ ✡ ✡ ✡ ✡ ✡ ✡ ✡ ✡ ✡ ✡ ✡ ✡ ✡ ✡ ✡ ✡ ✡ ✡ ✡ ✡ ✡ ✡ ✡

I'm traveling for work this week and haven't had time to write anything new, so most of what follows is something I wrote last year for this parasha.

wiscmass

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Thursday September 22, 2011 · 10:18 AM PDT

2011/09/22 · 10:18

A little over four years ago, I posted this diary:

Q: What do you call it when a person kills another person, with full intent and premeditation?
A: Murder.

Q: What do you call it when the government kills an innocent man, with full intent and premeditation?

A: Read the diary to find out.

This, among other reasons, is why I oppose the death penalty on principle.

wiscmass for Elders of Zion

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Sunday September 11, 2011 · 6:28 PM PDT

2011/09/11 · 18:28

It occurs to me that with so many folks boycotting the site this week (fight the good fight, my friends!), I'd better get this out tonight. The Jewish holiday season begins in just a couple of weeks and it's time to start organizing our series of diaries. We're looking for a little bit of anything and everything having to do with Rosh HaShana, Tzom G'daliah, Yom Kippur, Sukkot, Shmini Atzeret, and Simchat Torah. We need explanations of what the holidays are all about, divrei Torah, recipes appropriate to the holidays, traditions, anecdotes, etc., etc., etc.

Elders of Zion is a general Jewish interest group, open to anyone who wants to learn about Jews and Judaism. The group was created in order to facilitate such a space. Discussion of and questions about Jewish religion, ethnicity, history, culture, language, cuisine, music, literature, and identity are encouraged. Please keep this purpose in mind when commenting in our diaries. Antisemitism, diary hijacking, and I/P pie fights will not be tolerated and will be troll rated. For more information, see the inaugural diary.

wiscmass

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Saturday September 10, 2011 · 8:59 PM PDT

2011/09/10 · 20:59

I don't know what it is about our culture that requires that everything be sensationalized. I intend to spend the 10th anniversary of the 9/11 attacks avoiding the media as much as possible. Any of us who were at any of the key landmarks that day have our own stories, and I've spent the past week hearing about them over and over and over again. What I haven't heard much of are the roughly 3,000 stories we'll never know in their entirety; these are the stories that matter most to me today.

These are the people I'll be remembering today. The rest of us can be remembered tomorrow.

wiscmass for Elders of Zion

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Friday August 12, 2011 · 4:01 PM PDT

2011/08/12 · 16:01

Parashat Va'Etchanan
Deuteronomy 3:23-7:11

With apologies, I didn't realize until this afternoon that no one had signed up to write this week's d'var Torah. This week's portion is very complicated so last minute volunteers were unlikely, but I'd written about it before. In other words, what follows isn't really new material, but I think it's a pretty decent representation of Parashat Va'Etchanan.

Also, in part due to the last minute nature of this, I'm probably not going to be around to moderate. So usual rules/norms/customs apply. Shabbat shalom!

Elders of Zion is a general Jewish interest group, open to anyone who wants to learn about Jews and Judaism. The group was created in order to facilitate such a space. Discussion of and questions about Jewish religion, ethnicity, history, culture, language, cuisine, music, literature, and identity are encouraged. Please keep this purpose in mind when commenting in our diaries. Antisemitism, diary hijacking, and I/P pie fights will not be tolerated and will be troll rated. For more information, see the inaugural diary.

wiscmass for Elders of Zion

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Thursday July 28, 2011 · 4:00 PM PDT

2011/07/28 · 16:00

Parashat Mas'ei
Numbers 33:1-36:13

This is the final Torah portion in the Book of Numbers. Numbers is essentially a chronicle of the Israelites' 40 years of wandering in the desert between the Exodus from Egypt and the conquest of Canaan. At the beginning of the book, the Israelites had essentially just escaped from Egypt; here, at the end, they are about to enter Canaan.

And so it is that Mas'ei begins with a summary of all the Israelites' stops along the way: Rameses, Succoth, Etham, Pi-Ha'hiroth, Marah, Elim, the shores of the Red Sea, the wilderness of Sin, Dophkah, Alush, Rephidim, the Sinai Desert, Kibroth-Ha'ta'a'vah, Hatzeroth, Rithmah, Rimmon-Peretz, Libnah, Rissah, Kehelath, Mount Shepher, Haradah, Makheloth, Tahath, Terah, Mithkah, Hashmonah, Moseroth, Bene-Ja'akan, Hor Ha-Gidgad, Jotbath, Abronah, Etzion-Gever, Kadesh, Mount Hor, Tzalmonah, Punon, Oboth, Iyim, Divon-Gad, Almon-Divlotayim, the hills of Avarim, and the steppes of Moab at the Jordan River from Beit HaYeshimoth to Avel-Shittim. Forty-two stations in all.

Elders of Zion is a general Jewish interest group, open to anyone who wants to learn about Jews and Judaism. The group was created in order to facilitate such a space. Discussion of and questions about Jewish religion, ethnicity, history, culture, language, cuisine, music, literature, and identity are encouraged. Please keep this purpose in mind when commenting in our diaries. Antisemitism, diary hijacking, and I/P pie fights will not be tolerated and will be troll rated. For more information, see the inaugural diary.

wiscmass for Elders of Zion

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Thursday June 30, 2011 · 4:00 PM PDT

2011/06/30 · 16:00

Parashat Chukat
Numbers 19:1-22:1

All the world's a stage,
And all the men and women merely players;
They have their exits and their entrances,
And one man in his time plays many parts,
His acts being seven ages.
-- From Shakespeare's As You Like It, Act 2, Scene 7

Elders of Zion is a general Jewish interest group, open to anyone who wants to learn about Jews and Judaism. The group was created in order to facilitate such a space. Discussion of and questions about Jewish religion, ethnicity, history, culture, language, cuisine, music, literature, and identity are encouraged. Please keep this purpose in mind when commenting in our diaries. Antisemitism, diary hijacking, and I/P pie fights will not be tolerated and will be troll rated. For more information, see the inaugural diary.

wiscmass for Elders of Zion

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Thursday May 26, 2011 · 6:00 PM PDT

2011/05/26 · 18:00

Parashat B'midbar
Numbers 1:1-4:20

This week's Torah portion, the first in Sefer B'midbar, the Book of Numbers, focuses on two topics: a census of male Israelites (excluding Levites) between the ages of 20 and 50 (and thus eligible for military service) and a summary of some duties of the priests.

By coincidence, the last drash I wrote for this series, for Parashat Shmot, also begins with a census, though that one resulted in a count of 70 while this one yielded a count of 603,550. "Be fruitful and multiply" indeed!

Elders of Zion is a general Jewish interest group, open to anyone who wants to learn about Jews and Judaism. The group was created in order to facilitate such a space. Discussion of and questions about Jewish religion, ethnicity, history, culture, language, cuisine, music, literature, and identity are encouraged. Please keep this purpose in mind when commenting in our diaries. Antisemitism, diary hijacking, and I/P pie fights will not be tolerated and will be troll rated. For more information, see the inaugural diary.

wiscmass for Elders of Zion

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Sunday April 24, 2011 · 7:17 PM PDT

2011/04/24 · 19:17

There is a diary on the recommended list right now that, I'm told, has been on the rec list for most of the day. I've been through the diary and I can see why -- it's a good diary. But it has one little problem that actually isn't so little: it uses the word "Shylocks" in its poll. I'll take the diarist at his word that he didn't mean any offense by it and that he meant the word only in the contemporary sense in which it is frequently used. But the word has a nastier meaning -- it is historically an antisemitic slur, intended to convey the sense that Jews are greedy, avaricious, conniving, and evil.

It does not take a genius to figure out why Jews would be offended by that.

So I'll take the diarist at his word that he did not mean any offense. I'd even believe him if he said he didn't know the etymology of the word. But he doubled down with this:

I intend to offend Shylocks but not Jews...
I have no ill will towards the jewish people, and,
i admire their best qualities.

Not every shylock is jewish, and, not every Jew is a
shylock.

Sounds a bit too much like "some of my best friends are Jews" for my comfort. And now we have a problem.

Elders of Zion is a general Jewish interest group, open to anyone who wants to learn about Jews and Judaism. The group was created in order to facilitate such a space. Discussion of and questions about Jewish religion, ethnicity, history, culture, language, cuisine, music, literature, and identity are encouraged. Please keep this purpose in mind when commenting in our diaries. Antisemitism, diary hijacking, and I/P pie fights will not be tolerated and will be troll rated. For more information, see the inaugural diary.

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My grandparents didn't want to be converted

D'var Torah: VaYigash

It only took 1,500 years

D'var Torah: VaYeshev

This was cold-blooded murder

Jewish Holidays: Calling for Volunteers

Remembering

D'var Torah: Va'Etchanan

D'var Torah: Mas'ei

D'var Torah: Chukat

D'var Torah: B'midbar

"Shylocks"